Week 21- reflection

What do I want to get out of my three years at university? When asked to define my answer to this question it becomes quite difficult for me to answer, because in some ways, I’m not sure. I think that before coming, what I really wanted to do was to be able to express my creativity in new ways and put that creativity into an area that I would enjoy as a job and that would be employable. However having been on the course for a year now I am not sure I feel entirely the same. I don’t feel as creatively free as I did when I was on my BTEC Art and Design course and I find I am struggling considerably most of the time. This does not mean that I am not enjoying what I am learning, it just isn’t affecting me in the way I thought it was and it has made me assess my goals a little differently.

Many of the guest lecturers that have come to see us have told us over and over again how working in the game industry takes up your time, isn’t fun, demands that you are the best of the best and doesn’t pay very well for a long time and its left me thinking “well what is there left that’s good about it then?”.

I think that now what I really want to do with this course is acquire a number of skills that could make me employable in many fields of work. I don’t feel particularly passionate about the gaming industry anymore but I do get excited about the idea of creating things, and doing this course certainly gives me that ability in many ways. Maybe I will want to go into games after university, maybe I won’t, but either way, I am going to try my very best to do well because I believe that if I am here, why should I settle for a bad or even mediocre grade? I aim to be one of the best in the class by looking at what everybody else is doing and what is happening in the game industry and trying to learn new skills.

I think that if you are going to apply yourself to something you should do it fully and this may partly be to do with my beliefs as well. I am a Christian and one of the Bible verses that stands out to be as particularly challenging is “Work willingly at whatever you do, as though you were working for the Lord rather than for people” (Colossians 3:24).

I want to come out of university not regretting how hard I have worked. I want to be able to do digital and traditional drawings and paintings at a skilful level and I want to be able to 3D model in a way that will allow me to get a job in many different areas of work. I am genuinely excited whenever I learn something that develops these skills and I look forward to what the rest of the course has to offer me.

Outside of the course I also want to challenge everything I believe in currently and develop who I am as a person. I see university as a huge oppertuniy to mature in many different ways: in my opinions about things, my ability to deal with other people and the way I deal with situations generally. I see it as a very challenging atmosphere as everybody comes from different backgrounds and beliefs and I think that if you believe in anything you should challenge it constantly because otherwise how would you know that you were doing the right thing? I think that without coming to university I wouldn't be able to feel confident doing anything as an individual. It has given me the chance to grow up and I've found I have changed quite a lot over this last year and I feel more like an adult than a child. I hope that by the end of university I will be much more able to be who I want to be and not be afraid to fulfil my dreams.